BA 139 

The Schiavo case

I admit that earlier this week I said I wasn't going to comment on the case of Terri Schiavo, and I will partly keep that promise. I simply cannot comment on who is right here, her husband or her family. I don't know the facts, and it would be unfair.

Nevertheless, we could have a look at the circus around her. First, I have noticed that every time her parents show up anywhere, they have two monks with large crosses around their neck as body guards. This has surprised me tremendously. Maybe they went to a public relations firm and asked: "What can we do to win over public support?" It must have been a fairly cheap PR firm, because this parading around of their holiness is completely turning me off. I think that from a moral standpoint (there's that word again!), the family have a strong case, but let's leave out the wrapping paper here, shall we?

Another thing, related: I noticed just yesterday on the news someone demonstrating with a large sign which said: "Thou shalt not kill." To that person, I would say: "Rightly so brother, and neither shalt thou vote for people that kill."

A little consistency is all I ask for.

Something I haven't heard anyone mention yet is capital punishment. Why is this case so big, while every week people who CAN talk and reason and interact and all that ARE getting killed. Are there various levels of human life, others more worthwhile than some? As if we live in some kind of Indian cast system? Don't get me wrong, killers should be locked up, but that counts for all of them...

Thou shalt not kill means that we shouldn't kill (for those who are unfamiliar with the language Moses and God spoke to each other). To my knowledge, there wasn't some other paragraph which explained its exceptions. For those of you who haven't read the bible in a while.

Anyway, seemingly contrary to all the above, I don't know if euthanasia equals killing, but that's another discussion.

Have a nice easter holiday.

On Morality

I have been thinking about morality for a while now. I guess it's related to the fuss around the life or death of Terri Schiavo, about which I will only comment that, if she were to be let to die, I think that starving her is the worse way to do it. Surely they can think of some other more human way? People on death row get better treatment than that. Although the "she should be dead in two weeks" -element surely adds suspense, I just hope it's over soon, whatever the outcome.

Anyway, I was thinking about morality, and I just wanted to say that I am disappointed with the widespread idea that religious people are more moral. This is something I hear a lot these days. Disappointed is putting it light. I detest this notion, to be frank.

Especially at the time of the U.S. elections last year, I heard things like: "I am going to vote for Bush anyway because of his morality. I love it that he is a man who prays and is not afraid to say it."

What is it with (some) people who believe in God that they think they have some kind of exclusivity on calling their actions more moral than those who don't believe, or those that believe in another god?

I think morality is a purely human matter. Exclusively in fact. Moral values are those that preserve life, that fight for equality in the world, water and debt relieve for all, freedom of speech and thought. Stuff like that. As such, if you cannot put human values before religious ones, you have no right to call yourself more moral. Even if you support human values IN THE NAME of your religion (and let's be frank, I am talking about the gun-waving right-wing Christians here more than anyone else), you are taking a detour. Morality is about doing the right thing for others, without respect for your own preservational, conservative or religious instincts. Without having to contrast your choice against some belief-system before knowing whether your instinct is right or wrong. Morality is also about preserving other life forms, such as the environment, and animals other than human beings.

That´s what I was thinking about.

As for the Schiavo-case, is anyone aware that she suffered the heart attack which led to her current state because of some diet she was following to lose weight? Now this sounds ironic to me. Let's all be moral people, and teach our children what's healthy and what's not, so they don´t have to kill themselves losing weight. This sounds like a truly worthwhile fight, unlike others we embark on.

I feel for Terri Schiavo, another victim of life in the spoilt Western world.

Peace for all.

Need help?

Read Chomsky, watch Hicks!!!

Sick of Living the European Dream

Those of us who were at the forefront of living the 'European Dream' have always been the ones paying the highest price. Without recognition. Let me give you two poignant personal examples.

First, my studies (this all happened 13 years ago):

When I decided I wanted to attend a film school in the U.K. I became a special case in so far that the Dutch government, who was committed to paying school fees and living expenses for all its students, couldn't support MY studies in any way. They simply didn't recognize my chosen profession as one they supported outside of Holland. Strange, because if I would have studied architecture in the U.K. (a discipline then available in the Netherlands at some 27 institutions against only one film school), I would have had all regular support from my government just like any other student. And the architectural course was validated by the same board as my film course. Or if I would have studied in other regions neighboring the Netherlands (Belgium, the Western states of Germany), idem ditto. The U.K. is also a neighbor, but for some reason, it wasn't close enough.

Not one to give up easily, I took out a credit line to keep me alive for three years which to date, ten years after I graduated, I am still paying back. I am not looking for sympathy, but it helps to understand how actions speak louder than words. The free movement of people within what was then the European Community, had (and has) major drawbacks which are not as 'free' as they make us believe.

But get this: when during the three month summer holidays, I returned home and tried to sign up as 'out-of-work' while looking for something to do, I was told I had no right to any of the regular social benefits because I was a student. Something which the Ministry of Education failed to recognize.

Second example, our second daughter (this happened only yesterday):

So, one would think that things will have gotten better over time. Well, the Netherlands is currently under the spell of a xenophobic anti-muslim hysteria promoted by its government. Its image of tolerance is passé, and along with many immigrants in the Netherlands, I myself have now become the victim of some new keep-them-borders-closed-type legislation.

Our second daughter was born on November 3rd of last year. Her mother is Spanish and we have been together for ten years, but we are not married.

In three weeks the baby will undertake her first trip to the Netherlands with us, so yesterday I called the Dutch consulate in Madrid to enquire about adding her to my passport, just like I did with her five-year older sister. After having given me a list of requirements (photographs, etc) the lady suddenly asked: but... are you married? -No, I said.

In that case, your daughter is not recognized as having Dutch nationality until she is three years old, at which time you have to prove that she has been under your care up until then. Obviously, coming from a country where marriage and living together is treated equal, this sounds a little unreal. But it isn't.

I was explained that this law, which came into affect in 2003, exists because some (immigrant) men were recognizing children who weren't theirs. To obtain papers for them. So, now only children within wedlock are recognized. As such, it's nothing more than a simple discriminatory law which assumes that all children born within a marriage are always the product of that marriage, while with those of us who choose not to marry, you never know who's the father... Excuse my cynicism. It's a little Orwellian.

So, the Dutch state doesn't recognize me as the father of my daughter, who in turn is not Dutch. Unlike her sister, obviously. We can request her Dutch nationality when she is three, but I'll have to hand over the receipts of her diapers...

I have no option but to express my sincerest euh, disgust, for the current government and their irrational policies, which ultimately come out of this climate of xenophobic hysteria. The Holland I knew when I left in 1988 doesn't exist anymore. And don't let anyone tell you it's the most liberal country on earth. It was, but not anymore.

The Pope's New Book II

Ok, so, the same day I wrote my last message, the Pope was taken into hospital again. Poor man. The whole ordeal of the Catholic church seems something very absurd to me, but I recognize that the holy father, in some ways, has more power than the U.S. President, certainly over many more people. I just wish he'd use it more responsibly.

What I wanted to say was that I hope he gets better. And steps down to make room for someone else. A hippy-pope or something like that. Someone who doesn't make such outer-worldly and irresponsible statements. Until then, the Catholic Church as an institution, is just as guilty of this crap which is going on around us as the Western politicians and all of us who vote for them.

My 2c for what it's worth.

The Pope's New Book

Today the Pope's fifth book was published. It won't have slipped by anyone (it was widely published in the media) that in his book he compares abortion with the holocaust, saying: "Parliaments which create [...] such laws must be aware that they are transgressing their powers and remain in open conflict with the law of God and the law of nature."

Later on in the book, referring to the attack on his life in May 1981, his holiness says that he was "practically dying" when he was given a "life saving blood transfusion."

Am I the only one who thinks that blood transfusions are in open conflict with the law of nature?

The pope is silly.

Million Dollar Baby

Today I read that the American Right has started a campaign against Clint Eastwood's film Million Dollar Baby, calling it a film which promotes euthanasia and a 'nazi' film.

You'd think the extreme right in America has an allergy for anything which starts with the letters "clint"?

Anyway, they're dumb.

The Most Arrogant Thing I Ever Did

Here's an article I wrote on the metro one day in the spring of 2003 but never published anywhere about a stint in international business...

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The most arrogant thing I ever did, happened sometime at the end of the year 1999. At the time I was working as an agent for a Dutch wind turbine manufacturer, a strange job for a filmmaker, but I was lost, between professions and looking for a new but temporary challenge.

Spain was (and still is) the fastest growing country in the world for wind energy, and this sector had moved itself from a world of ideologists in sandals to bankers and top managers in tailor-made suits. It was the perfect time to get on that train and make good money on the way, as an intermediary.

I was working with a board member of the Dutch company, a Brit called Kevin, a senior businessman and at the same time my second father and business mentor. If I have any integrity or honour in the way I cuurently conduct my business, it is because of what I learned from him. Besides, Kevin was a remarkable man who always got on with everyone and had the curious credit to his name that he organized Live-Aid together with Bob Geldoff at the end of the 80's. I have always loved the man and even today we are in touch regularly.

Anyway, that day at the end of 1999. We were working on a very big deal with a Spanish company. It involved the sale of some 300 wind turbines, a deal worth about 150 million Euros. My commission on this deal would have been over a million. Of course, for all sorts of reasons about which Kevin and I could write an interesting book, the deal never went through.

However, that day, we had made considerable progress around the conference table at the offices of the Spanish company in Madrid. The Dutch managing director had flown in that morning, along with the technical director, and we'd been looking at spreadsheets all morning, discussing percentages and the like. But, lunch time had arrived and in Spain (unlike in Holland), that is a signal to stop and engage in a tradition just as important to any business deal as the spreadsheets: socializing while having lunch together. Getting to know each other. Delightful.

We were seven people and the Spanish party had just paid the bill for the elaborate and very satisfying lunch (to start with, we had some of the best Spanish cured ham I ever had, and probably another two main dishes, of course followed by desert and coffee and everything exquisite to the bones).

When walking outside, all suited up like kings, we were chattering away waiting for the cars to be driven up in front of us, suddenly, a beggar approached us. And this is when it happened.

The man, obviously a homeless person for his poor attire and hygiene, asked one of the Dutch people for money (in Spanish, which they didn't understand of course). Within a second, I had grabbed into my right pocket and fished out a 100 peseta coin, which I pushed into the man's hand, turning around him so that his only option would be to walk on. Besides, very few people give a whole 100 pesetas and he was probably happy with his catch. He also knew it was time to shuffle along. Nevertheless, I felt horrible.

Who wants a good party among business people who are DOING A DEAL see spoiled by reality? A few noses were raised, the car arrived and back we went to the conference table and the spreadsheets.

I have often felt that being involved in this top-level of business, discussing millions as if they are slices of bread, creates a very false personal reality for its participants. I have experienced this myself on more than one occasion. The perceived power which comes with 'the deal' is tremendously attractive, and to be among like-minded people can alter one's identity into thinking that the world turns around your little group. Most other people around you become irrelevant, workers who are lucky to be at the executive end of your brilliance. And if the world outside only knew what important things we were discussing around the conference table... I often felt that I was doing the most important thing I could be doing at that moment, driven by the euphoria of the deal in the powerful company of suits, ties and business class flights.

But all you need to break that thin piece of glass on which your false perceptions rest is a homeless person asking for money. I have often wondered why I gave him money, where I hardly ever do (I do give to buskers and other musicians, because I want them to keep playing). And maybe my colleagues at the time thought I was very kind to the man, and I scored some points with them. But deep in my heart I am ashamed to acknowledge that I gave the man the money to get rid of him. I didn't want to come down from the high we were all in, and face the harsh reality of the growing gap between rich and poor. And what was 100 pesetas compared to the commission I was about to score? Zilch!

That gap by the way is only ever recognized by the poor, never by the rich. Have you ever heard a wealthy person say: "Oh yes, in my country there is a tremendous gap between rich and poor?" I don't think so.

I left the wind business a year later, after having done a much smaller deal (my goal was one sales contract, to see it through to the end) and making a respectable commission for which I have been in court fighting some of the very same people who were at that luncheon, to actually get it paid, for nearly two years now. Business for business, it's boring.

Never again. I'll stick to filmmaking.

Post Script - ironically, the Dutch company went bust on the back of the smaller deal, and I received just enough commission to buy a second-hand car. I have never shed a tear over that.

U.S. Elections

Then, on the 1st of November, I sent the below message to the same groups. You wouldn't believe the replies I got! From love letters to hate mail. See for yourself...

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Madrid, 1st of November 2004

Dear friends,

Just like I am eager to share with you the imminent arrival of our second daughter in only a matter of days, I am equally concerned (and spending a lot of time thinking about) the fate of others, especially those who were born into less fortunate circumstances.

I have been bothered by the amount of negative energy we are bombarded with these days. There's so much sadness and violence on the news. And so much distrust on the streets. More than I remember to happen at any other time. Yet I think much could change this week, as we look to America to cast their vote for what invariably will greatly affect us all, all over the world.

There's something every week. This week I have been surprised (a better word might be aghast) by the first study into Iraqi civilian casualties since the start of the war in that country. There hadn't been any reliable statistics in this field (surprisingly, nor the occupying army nor the Iraqi interim government collects this data), but now an independent study has finally published its results. Earlier estimates had been anything up to 20,000, but this new study, the only one to date (they went door to door checking death certificates in a large sample of neighborhoods all across the country), has now established a minimum figure of 100,000 Iraqi civilians killed, although it was said this number is probably closer to 200,000. Many of them were children and even babies.

This is simply tremendous. Let's think about this for a while. We can leave aside the facts that Iraq was not involved in 9/11 and that there were no weapons of mass destruction. That leaves the only argument still probably valid, and the only one still used by the Bush administration, that the world is better off without Sadam Hussein. True, but incomplete.

This is a utopian hypothesis, useful for political purposes but separated from reality. While it is true that Saddam Hussein belongs behind bars, the world at large is by far worse off since the war in Iraq. To start, I can tell you that MY world is worse off. And mine seems irrelevant compared to those 100 to 200 thousand civilian casualties, and their families.

Even in the event that the world would have been better off (which it is clearly not, unless you only watch Fox News), we need to seriously ask ourselves: what is a 'fair' price we are asking the Iraqi citizens to pay for OUR security? Besides of course the more urgent question whether these deaths have really translated into a more secure world, or not.

As far as the first question is concerned, I have been very impressed this year with the effect the Madrid bomb attacks of 11-M have had on our collective state of mind. In all of Spain, the aftermath of this cowardly event is still very much alive every single day. The final death toll was 192, and more than 3000 wounded, some very seriously. I have a good friend who lost his sister in the attacks. She was just entering one of the trains when a bomb exploded pretty much in her face. Not knowing this at the time and not having heard from her, my friend spent the entire day looking forher, checking lists in hospital emergency rooms all over the city until, 14 hours later, he finally found her at the morgue installed in the Madrid congress center. I see him regularly and, despite having become a father recently (an event we thought might change his outlook on life for the better), he remains in deep grief, full of hatred and very angry. I don't blame him. Today, more than seven months later, he is clinically depressed, on Prozac, and just about managing to deal with his day-to-day reality.

This made me think a lot of the effect any single innocent death has on just about any family or group of friends. My friend, his parents, his sister's husband, other relatives and friends... their world collapsed to change forever. And that's only one person dead. This in turn made me wonder about the amount of grief and hatred which must exist in Iraq. Even if we take the low figure of 100,000 civilian deaths, then we are probably talking about two to four million family members and close friends directly affected. Not to mention the wounded, which might be five or tenfold. Which logically explains the tremendous amount of anger and opposition (whether violent or not) to the occupying forces.

With this argument, I am leaving the answer of the first question (what price do we expect to pay the Iraqi population for our security?) up to you. This is a moral matter, which each person will have to decide for her- or himself.

Secondly, all of this trouble, the 1000+ American casualties, the 180 billion dollar price tag... and is the world really a safer place? Or are they just telling us that it is? Well, just think of the things we have now which we didn't have one year ago: we have live decapitations on the internet (one a week on average), we had the world's first Europe-based terrorist attack by Muslim extremists (this is significant because of Europe's traditional position in the Middle-East crisis), we now have a continuous threat of credible terrorist attacks (leaving aside 9/11, which is unrelated to Iraq and attempted to deal with in the Afghan war, there were never this many credible threats until we started the Iraq war), we have tremendous economical pressure, job losses and sky high oil prices, and, most importantly and sadly, we have created an environment in which xenophobia and racial hatred against Muslims has multiplied tremendously.

And the benefits, where are they? Anyone who thinks they are safer now than, say, three years ago, is fooling themselves. War doesn't create safety, it never has. War creates hatred. And hatred creates the need for revenge. And revenge, by its very nature, is unsafe... The answer to the second question (do we have a more secure world?), in my eyes, seems clear.

Now, above all, and like everyone, I want peace and security. But I want this for everyone, not just my family, my town or my country. I believe that we all deserve this in equal terms all over the world. And besides, I know Iwill be safer if everyone is safer. The more hatred we create against us (this is how this all started in the first place: why did 9/11 happen?), and the more poverty we allow to exist, the more unsafe the world will be.

But how do we get security? To me, the relationships in the world are like relationships in any situation (say at work, or in your church). Safety and security are a matter of trust, and trust is a matter of respect and dialogue. As long as we go around like modern-day cowboys terrorizing people ("here's the West, fixing the things which are wrong in your country"), we will halt any opportunity to create security. It's so simple that a child can understand it. Which makes me wonder why the Bush administration can't.

Friends, I believe that we are on the wrong track. We are responsible for having created an environment of hate and mistrust, by destroying entire countries rather than just the perpetrators. As such, we in the West, through our violent actions, are directly responsible for the hatred we are so surprised to be confronted with.

For those who are allowed to vote in this matter on Tuesday: if you are truly concerned about your safety, and that of your family, not to mentionof our fellow world citizens in many other parts of the world, then I urge you please to not vote for those who think a valid foreign policy is focused around armed conflict. Please, in name of many on the other side of theAtlantic (recent poll: some 85%), who are also directly affected by your vote, please do not vote for George Bush. Four more years in office will undoubtedly destroy what little is left of a possibility to mend the gaping wound in the world left by his administration's actions. If you are confused, or maybe you don't want to vote Kerry, fine, simply don't vote. But please, voting for George W. Bush is voting for the ongoing destruction of the civilized world. Please don't let that happen. America will not be the nice and safe place I came to enjoy so much in the late 80s and early 90s until there is a serious change in foreign policy. Nor will the world while Western allies go around killing people. The sooner a change of U.S. president, the sooner there will be a safer solution.

Sometime during this coming week our second daughter will be born. Somewhat of a coincidence is that she will carry the name of the sister of my friend, the one who was a victim of Madrid's 11-M bombings. I don't want her to grow up in an environment where we teach our children that violence is the solution to conflict. If you are voting on Tuesday, you can help me achieve that.Violence is the easy solution, but not the moral one.

I am (very) open to discussion.

For a better world, as always.

Madrid Bomb Attacks

Here is a slightly shorter version of a message I wrote to friends, family and a few newgroups after the Madrid attacks. Although I received a lot of positive mails, there were also a few who thought I was being naive with my wishes for the world. Time will tell.

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16 march 2004

Dear friends,

Thank you all for the many messages and phone calls we received last week. I realize I haven't responded to most of them (for reasons I will explainbelow), and now that life seems to go back to semi-normal, I prefer to write something longer and send it to a bunch of people at the same time.

To answer the common question: we are ok. We are healthy, we were far away from the attacks, and our circle of family and friends seems to be intact. We are however shocked, still, for a wide variety of reasons, not in the least the cruelty of this act and its human cost. And for the scar it has left behind on the city I love so much.

Some 13 bombs had been packed in bags and left in luggage areas of a few local commuter trains all running the same line into the city center. Most of them exploded right before 8am on Thursday morning. The explosion with the highest toll was in Madrid, some 300 meters from the central station (the train was running a few minutes late - had that not been the case then the human cost would have been even higher). The amount of people killed because of the attacks has now risen to more than 200 and there are 1460 wounded, a lot of which with damage for life (deaf- and blindness, amputated limbs, ears, deformations, etc). Some 40 or so still linger between life and death.

A few hours into the afternoon I received a call from KRO Television (Holland). A few reporters were already in a plane and they were looking for a local producer for a current affairs program. Was I interested? Seeing the opportunity to do something productive with what had happened that day, to contribute something to the flow of information, and to process my own (strong) feelings, I said yes. I resurfaced last Sunday night, four days later, from what I must say has been one of the most emotional, gratifying and intense experiences since a long time. We produced a 4 minute piece for a program called Netwerk for Friday night, and a 15 minute piece for Sunday night. We talked to specialists on ETA and international terrorism, interviewed the Minister of Foreign Affairs, but also taxi drivers and people on the street. We covered the 'official' demonstration on Friday night (which mobilized more than 11 million people in the country) but also the ad-hoc ones, which spontaneously started.

Saturday night it became clear that the attack might have been the workof an Al Quada cell due to Spain's involvement in the Iraq war (against the wishes of more than 90% of the Spanish people). The news seemed to change every five minutes, and along with hundreds of journalists, some of which from countries I hadn't even heard of before, we were continously changing and adapting our plans. As a result, I was standing by the empty train at the central station 24 hours after the attacks had happened. Until that time, they had somehow still seemed somewhat removed from me. But seeing the gaping holes in the train, and a single shoe on the pavement - forgotten by the rescue workers who had collected all of the victims' personal belongings by now, reality really hit me. There was no escaping it. Is this the beginning of a new era?

As you all well know, Spain has since gone through a dramatic political change. If the timing of the attacks were to coincide with, and change the outcome of, the national elections, then they met their aim. While the conservatives were still well-ahead in the polls a week ago, last Sunday the Spanish people voted overwhelmingly for the Socialist Party. Our new president has already comitted to pulling Spanish troups out of Iraq, a war his party has always considered a farce. I support them in this, but for us there is a bittersweet twist.

My wife has been a member of the cabinet of the Minister of Science and Technology for two-and-a-half years now. She is an advisor on scientific policy. The outcome of the elections cost her her job. She has a five-star resumé and we are not worried at all about her prospects, but taking everything together, we could easily say we have had a very heavy few days.

Questions remain. While ETA is weak and disorganized, and an attack from them might have heralded the end of something (a final blow, if you wish), the Al Quada scenario is a much scarier one. Is this the beginning of a new wave of violence against normal citizens? Will we see a growing distrust and prejudice against the immigrant community from Muslim countries? Will Europe now become subject of a more intense security operation a-la USA (airports etc)? Do we want to live like this? Is the world really a safer place?

My previous convictions have only been confirmed. I think we are on the wrong track, and that more attacks will follow both in Europe and the USA. I believe we need to find a negotiated solution for the Isreal-Palestine conflict and pull out of Iraq. This is what will bring security to the world, not more weapons.

On Sunday afternoon, with most of the work done, the Dutch team sent me home for a few hours. I was finally able to be with Paula for a while. Sometime in the middle of this period, she came to me and said: "you know dad, there was this train, and there was an explosion, and boom". The movement of her hands and her big dark eyes illustrated the force of the explosion. My heart broke. Why does she have to tell me this? She is four, she is not emotionally affected by all this. But the very fact that her life has taken her to a point where she could tell something like this to her father, got me so scared. We don't even live in a war-zone, or in a country in constant conflict. Just imagine.

Yesterday, Monday, I felt useless. The TV-work was done and it was impossible trying to get back to my regular job, my company, the projects, organizing my desk which had been stacked with mail, papers, etc. At night we received a phone call from a friend. A common friend had lost his sister in the attacks. She was one of the first names on the list on Thursday. The world is smaller than I thought. In a city of nearly 6 million people, when 200 die and 1460 have been wounded, everyone knows someone. Be prepared for that.

Thanks again for all the messages and calls of concern. We are truly grateful for those. Myself, I'm just happy to have had the opportunity to be so close to it all, and to process my own emotions in a constructive manner through the work we did. I also hope that you and yours are well. Life goes on, and I'm back to my dreams of films and documentaries, of a new house and a larger family. In reverse order...

Much love from Madrid.

Introduction

See below re: Questions I.

These were the first thoughts which popped in my head when I started this blog. I would say that questions define me. I am never satisfied. There is always another question. It makes for a frustrating existence, sometimes.

Anyway, I am republishing some articles I wrote and sent to newsgroups last year. They should be on tomorrow. As you will see/read, there are many things which make me think, but the current political climate in the world has been on top of the list these past few years. All I can hope for is that my questions and criticism can be a tool for improvement. And that those of you who feel attacked, and have let me know in the past, should know that I want peace for everyone (which includes everyone!), also for you...

So, here we go...

Questions I

Can it be true that we are going where we're going? Isn't there anyone concerned about the state of the world anymore? Are the connections between what seems good and what seems bad not obvious?

Questions questions, running through my mind. I hope you enjoy my blog.